The Fingerbang Misfire
by NarutoCraze
Summary: When Shikamaru suspects his father of having an affair, he calls upon his beloved Team 10 to help discover the truth. However, they come to find that the path to truth is harder to tread when their own secrets are brought to the light.


It was still early in the morning across the village of Konoha; the sky was beginning to lighten, though it still contained a few dwindling stars, just not yet ready to welcome the sun.

In his bed, Shikamaru Nara slept soundly: the sheets hanging halfway off his bed, along with the upper half of his body. His room was silent, with the shades pulled down so that the sun couldn't break through: after all, the way his bed was aligned with the window, the sun would be bound to wake him up, and he'd be damned to be up early on a day off from training.

Sure, he was now a Chuunin and held more responsibility in the village of Konoha; however, Shikamaru was still...Shikamaru. Rank didn't change a damn thing about his personality. And sure, he saw how his still-Genin friends and teammates reacted to him and his new title: they expected him to mature, to change completely now that he was considered a leader. And yeah: he did grow up in certain ways. But that still didn't mean he wasn't good ol', lazy Shikamaru; and now that he had finally gotten a day off from his responsibilities as a Chuunin, he was going to spend it exactly how he wanted: sleep as late as he wanted, get up when he felt like it, go for a walk when he got the urge, just spend his afternoon cloudwatching. And so far, things were going according to plan.

As the clock ticked to 4:58 in the morning, however, Shikamaru's eyes shot open.

_ What the hell was that?_ he thought. _Sounded like someone slamming a door._ He rolled over in his bed, pulling his sheets up off the floor. He looked over at the clock on his wall.

_ You've got to be joking_, he thought. _It's five o'clock in the morning, and I'm awake...because of someone slamming the door. What a total drag..._

Shikamaru huffed loudly, staring up at the ceiling. _Great..._he steamed. _Now I'm wide awake. This is the kind of shit that pisses me off and puts me in a bad mood. Seriously: who slammed the door?!_

He threw his sheets off, stretching as he climbed out annoyed. It was still dark in his house; he couldn't see any lights on in the hallway, but, obviously, _somebody_ was up. _And that _somebody_ is about to get their ass chewed out_, Shikamaru thought, rubbing his eyes as he left his room.

No one was awake upstairs. _Mom and Dad's room is dark. But one of them's got to be up._ He continued down the dark hallway, making his way to the stairs.

Downstairs in the kitchen, Yoshino paced around, making preparations for breakfast. She stomped around, anger just radiating off.

"I just can't believe him!" she said outloud to herself, "The nerve of that man! Trying to tell _me_-Hmph!" She snorted, grabbing pots and pans from the cupboards, unaware of how much noise she was now making. "I mean, I do _everything_ for him! I cook, I clean-he wouldn't last _one damn day_ without me! And for him to just...Ohh-"

"Mom?" Shikamaru interrupted, standing under the doorframe with his arms crossed.

"What?" she shot back, not even acknowledging her son.

"What are you doing making breakfast at five in the morning?"

"I just _felt_ like making breakfast at five in the morning, Shikamaru!" she yelled, turning towards him. It wasn't like she was mad at Shikamaru in particular, just the whole male population in general for right now: and the fact that her son was a spitting image of his father, didn't help the situation at the moment. "And if you have a problem with me getting up this early to make you and that..." she paused, anger just oozing out of her, "_father_ of your's breakfast, then you can go elsewhere to eat because you and him wouldn't deserve me _slaving away_ in this kitchen!"

"But I just asked what you were doi-"

"And you know what, Shikamaru!" she continued, "I don't appreciate that tone you using, and you shouldn't be up this early anyhow, because you're just getting in my way of making breakfast!"

Shikamaru shook his head. _It's _this_ damn early in the morning, and Mom's already in a bad mood. Man, this day's gonna be a total drag_.

"So should I even ask where Dad is?" he said with a bored tone. Immediately though, he regretted it with the look his mother got in her eyes when the word "Dad" left his lips.

"That no-good father of your's is down in the Narake," she said rather calmly, which for some reason scared Shikamaru even more. "Yes, he's down at the laboratory, while I stay in the house preparing his meal like I'm some kind of slave and do I get anything in return from him? No! Nothing! And he just shuts himself away down there, while I'm left here, taking care of the house, his son, everything!" she ranted on.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. His parents always got into about something. Even though his dad was completely whipped, his mother found _something_ to be mad at him about. And when they weren't talking, Shikamaru got stuck with having his mom take out her anger on him and having to listen to his dad rave about women and their peculiar behavior. Eventually though, they talked and worked everything out. But those days in between were complete hell and Shikamaru stayed out of the house for as long as he could.

_ But damn it, why'd they have to start on one of his scarce days off? This is such a drag!_

"...I mean, how hard is it to say 'Thank you dear for taking care of me, taking care of our house, our ranch, our son!' Is it really hard for you _men_?!"

_ Oh no_, he thought, closing his eyes. _She pulled me into it already: "you men"._

"Shikamaru, I just don't want to talk to you right now!" she yelled, "Just...go help your _father_!"

Shikamaru didn't say another word as he rushed out of the house. _At least Dad's whining is tolerable...Mom's wrath...yeah right_.

* * *

Down in the Narake, Shikaku was mumbling to himself as he studied over one of his older medical books, as Shikamaru slid in quietly.

"The woman thinks she just knows everything...I tell ya...sometimes..." he drifted off. Shikamaru watched quietly, leaning against one of the racks that held the famous deer antlers from which Shikaku used to make medicine.

"She just doesn't know..." Shikaku whispered, "I could have any woman I want...and I chose her...and he acts _that_ way...she's so troublesome..." Shikamaru grunted out a small laugh accidentally, snapping his father out of his daydreams.

"Shikamaru," he said slowly, motioning his son over. "Sit down, boy. I wanna have a talk with you..."

_ Oh man! Here we go: one of Dad's speeches about women. I can already tell this day's gonna be a drag..._

"Son," he began, drifting in and out, "Women...they're very sensitive...you'll learn that soon enough. You have to really watch what you say around them because they can take the smallest..._thing_...and turn it into a fight to the death...you'll learn one day...you just have to listen and agree...just listen and say "Yes, dear" and you'll have a happy...marriage..." Shikaku was tired.

_ And a bit drunk. He's already got a bottle of Sake out_, Shikamaru rolled his eyes. He loved his dad and respected him more than any other person he knew...but sometimes, he was just a bit too much.

"And see..." Shikaku continued lazily, "Make sure, Shikamaru...that when you _think_ you've found the right girl that you wanna marry...and have a family with...make sure...make sure...are you listening, boy?"

"Yeah, Dad," Shikamaru responded, a little amused at his dad's stupor, "I'm listening."

"Well, what do you think I'm going to say to you?"

"Dad, it's too early. This morning's already a total drag."

"You idiot. You need to take advice from your old man when he's wanting to help you out."

Shikamaru sighed. "Fine. What do I need to make sure of?"

"Make sure..." Shikaku paused, "That's not going to want to control every bit of your life...or else you're gonna wonder...about other women...your Old Man...just like him...wonder what what happen if I just..."And with that, Shikaku nodded off.

"What?!" Shikamaru replied, his eyes wide with shock.

_ What the hell did he just say...wondering about..._other_ women_? Shikamaru sat down, running his hand through his hair.

"Oh man," he whispered, "He couldn't...he wouldn't..." And with that, Shikamaru's imagination took off. "This is such a _drag_..."


End file.
